Diego’s Fridays: Father Brian Sistare
To commence a project you must launch it with an invigorating launch, which is why I opted to interview Father Brian Sistare from Saint John the Baptist Church in Pawtucket.
Let us now sit in our pupils and listen to the story of my current spiritual father.
Newfound Territory
It was May of 2017 and Father Gerald Harbour, now former Priest of St. John the Baptist, gave a message to his parishioners stating that a new pastor was arriving from the Sacred Heart and Holy Family parishes in Woonsocket, hoping that the Saint John the Baptist community would welcome him with open arms.
July 2017 was the month of change. Father Sistare first arrived at his new home in Pawtucket. Father described his transitioning as challenging as he is not a native Spanish speaker and not a quick learner of languages. He had learned Spanish when he spent 2005 in Honduras and went to school in Guatemala for a month, but had never spoken it consistently. Then-auxiliary Bishop Robert Evans told him to practice his Spanish to prepare for his new abode, but he was going into unknown waters.
Just as it was a difficult transition for Father, it was a difficult transition for the Parish Community. Father Harbour (known as Father Jerry) had been the diocesan priest for a number of years and people were not prepared for a change. Familiarity and habituation cause attachment, which is exactly what transpired at the parish.
Although the change was impending, most people remained. As time went on, Father was able to “win people over” via his teachings of the Catholic Faith, as many people were skeptical of his private nature.
Now that six years have passed since that moment, Father has become accustomed to his new community and learned certain values from them, including patience and familial warmness. The Spanish community is used to arriving late to Mass and going to the bathroom during Mass, so he has learned to comprehend their motives and not make “the face” when they do something he disapproves of. He also remarked how when certain Spanish parishioners do not come weekly, they come back with beaming smiles, which Father considers “beautiful in a sense”.
Father loves his Parish community; they love him back.
Why Become a Priest?
Being born in Westerly and being part of an Italian family, Father Sistare grew up in the Catholic Faith. He received all of his sacraments and was a loyal parishioner, but things went astray during his high school years. He got lured into all of the things that most teenagers experience during those years of development, but still ended up graduating and going to the University of Rhode Island (URI).
Going to college was an achievement, but ended up being an abominable decision. He went to URI with no goals, joining a fraternity and losing himself to drinking and partying. Fortunately, he returned back to his roots when he turned 19.
In February of 1993, Father Sistare went to a retreat that made him rethink his entire life. During such retreat, Father recollects a moment when the crucifixion of Jesus was shown and he could hear via a microphone “the nails being pounded”. This instant made him decide things had to change, but tragedy also did as well.
Two months after the retreat on April 16, 1993, one of his friends was stabbed in a fight and unfortunately passed away. This event caused Father to become angry and want to seek revenge against the perpetrator, but his local youth group and diocesan priest Father Raymond Suriani supported him and got him more involved in the faith. Finally, in July, Father went to a summer retreat at the infamous Franciscan University of Steubenville, which solidified his interest in pursuing the Catholic faith.
He then transferred from URI to Steubenville for his last two and a half years of college, where he finally decided Priesthood was his calling. Once he graduated, he became part of the Franciscan friars in New York, helping the poor and homeless in South Bronx.
Father’s parents were extremely supportive of his decision, as he stated that his Mom said something along the lines that “He was bad and now he’s good or something like that”. His parents became more involved in their faith during his formation years, as they felt proud of him for answering God’s calling.
Father has always been happy that his parents have had his back on his spiritual decisions, as he remembers that one of the Franciscan brothers he resided with, who was from New Zealand, had parents that were embarrassed by his decision and ordered him to take off his robe at home.
In general, he went on the wrong roads for a couple of years but finally found the correct road after many different experiences.
The Duty of Priesthood
Father is always on the move, regardless of what day it is. He usually kicks off his Mondays at around six and replenishes himself with some habitual coffee and breakfast, followed by taking out his dogs, Trooper and Mary, for a walk. When he returns, he starts doing the Roman Breviary (Liturgy of the Hours) and persists in doing that periodically during the day.
Certain days throughout the month bring new events such as the food bank, the hospitality house, and hospice duty at times. Father gets Wednesdays and Thursdays off, and he opts to either stay put at church or go back and visit his family in Westerly. The luxury of living so close to his family is something he values highly.
The climax of his week is obviously on the weekend, which is when he has Saturday Mass in the morning, followed by a scheduled wedding or funeral. From 3:30 to 7:00 PM he has his three-and-a-half-hour marathon of doing confessions and celebrating Mass in both English and Spanish. He then gets to rest to prepare for 9:30 AM English Mass and 11:30 AM Spanish Mass on Sundays, which is then finally followed by some merited rest after a long week.
If we go back in time to 2020, Father recollects how his routine was drastically altered during the COVID-19 pandemic, when he had to celebrate Mass daily by himself and was not able to interact with his own parishioners. He described this time period as being arduous for him, as he believed that was an instance where people needed God the most, but were affixed to their homes due to fear of contamination.
In consensus, Father loves being the prime exemplar for Catholics around our community and thinks that the best part about being a priest is celebrating the sacraments, due to their contrasting emotions and their ability to allow him to be “part of a family”.
Father’s Golden Prayer
As a curious Catholic myself, I asked Father what he believed were the prayers that we should put in our “To Do” list each and every day.
He responded with The Rosary, as he believes that Mary, our spiritual mother, loves us so much. Through her own intercession, explains Father, she then gives those prayers to Jesus, and that “mother-son combo” is something that is undeniably strong.
Priests Getting Married?!
One of the topics that have been doing the rounds in the last couple of years around the church (which has attracted my interest) is allowing priests in the Catholic church to marry. Being previously interested in the vocation of priesthood, I asked Father his thoughts on such controversial topic.
He actually surprised me, as he told me that Catholic priests in the Western Hemisphere are part of this concept called the Latin right, which includes the vow of celibacy. Conversely, in Eastern Europe, this right does not exist, meaning that priests can get married before they become ordained! Father recollects studying at the seminary and seeing some of his classmates from Ukraine with pictures of their girlfriends, which he found very funny.
In his estimation, the Latin right will not change, as it is part of a term called the discipline of the church. He acknowledges that priests are attracted to women, as that is the way God allowed all of his children to be conceived, but recognizes the time constraints there would be between managing a physical family and a spiritual family.
He also believes that there is a lot of societal pressure on priests to get married when they do not even consider the sentiments of the priests themselves. Father personally would not like to get married but knows that in another life, he would have probably taken the calling of marriage.
The Church and the LGBTQ Community
As it is June, which is secularly touted as Pride Month, I felt it was adequate to ask Father about the stance of the Catholic Church on the LGBTQ community.
Father Sistare says that they are welcome to any Catholic church as Catholicism identifies everyone as children of God, regardless of their race, skin color, or sexual desire. He does not find it necessary to identify people by their own sexual desires as we are all mere human beings.
He did state that he does not support same-sex behavior, as God created man and women to join as one as stated in the book of Genesis.
Regardless, Father emphasized the ideal of being equal, which I concord with him wholeheartedly. We are all humans and no one is above or under anyone for their own preferences. Being attracted to someone of the other sex is not a crime, it is just something of preference.
Diego’s Question Corner
Before ending the interview, I decided to ask Father my own questions that I was personally interested in asking him. This Q&A section will be included in every single edition of Diego’s Fridays, so this is the first of many. The full section is included in the full podcast version of this interview, in which we talked about someone breaking into the church, the story of adopting his dogs, and the Catholic faith in Sports.
Q: What do you think of the new generation arising?
A: Father says that there is hope. Unfortunately, Father notices that parents do not bring their children consistently to Mass on a weekly basis, only bringing them when they are doing their sacraments. He says that it is their responsibility to instill such value in their lives. Other than that, he just wants the youth to have a relationship with God, which will eventually lead them to participate in their local parish. He yearns for the youth to “stay close to God, come to the church, [and] be involved in the church”.
Q: If you were not a priest, what do you think you would be doing now in life?
A: In all honesty, Father had no concrete answer for me. He entered URI for ocean engineering because he wanted to be a scuba diver, but as soon as he saw all of the science courses he had to take, he backed out. He went on to tell me that his dad was a successful businessman, being a purchasing agent at General Dynamics Electric Boat, so that could have been a possibility due to its monetary advantages. Sports and animal care also raised his interest, but his 5'6 height and his disdain for injections stopped anything from materializing. In consensus, he believes he would have been married with a beautiful family with children, but is not sure what his occupation would be.
Q: What is your message to those who are currently not practicing any religion?
A: Father says that the Catholic Church is open to them and that they should “just come be part of it”. He believes that when more people are involved in the Catholic faith, they feel more valued as human beings, especially through the numerous events local parishes host on a daily basis.
The Final Legacy Question
To end off each edition of Diego’s Fridays, I will ask everyone the ultimate question, which is:
What is the legacy you want to leave here on Earth?
When asked, Father Sistare hopes that his lasting legacy will consist of bringing people to have a closer relationship with God and leading them toward their eternal salvation in Heaven.
Just like anyone else, Father is a human and has his own weaknesses, which he deals with during prayer each day. He might seem very strict or not have the bubbly personality of other priests, but he is an amazing person. Just like any of us, he might have a bad day, but his goal is to help his parishioners and people of his community to live a better life.
In his own words:
So that’s my hope. My lasting legacy is that I was a priest of God. That I did what I was called to do. I tried to lead by example, with words as well, leading people closer to Christ in the Kingdom of Heaven.
To conclude, I would like to reiterate my gratitude to Father Sistare for allowing me to talk to him about his life, and I hope that you will all be coerced to attend a Mass at Saint John the Baptist Church in the foreseeable future.
To learn more about Saint John the Baptist, visit their website at: https://www.churchofstjohnthebaptist.org/
To listen to the full, uncut interview, enter my manybio link and click on the podcast section. My manybio link is: https://many.bio/diegosfridays
